The Comparison Trap: Diary of a Blogger

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She’s way prettier than me. Her pictures look so much better than mine. I’ll never have that many followers. I’m not rich, I can’t buy all of these designer clothes, so I’ll never reach that level. How do they have it all together? Do these thoughts run through your mind daily as you scroll through your Instagram feed? I know they do mine…or used to until recently I got a hold of myself and my thoughts. This is something that has been weighing on me as of late and I’m sure I’m not the only one. Comparing yourself to other people’s social media life is seriously dangerous and will take a toll on your mental health. Or, comparing yourself to people in general is not healthy. It seems more prevalent now that I’m blogging, than before. I don’t think we do it intentionally but at the end we’ve sized our life up against someone else’s without even realizing it. People only allow you to see what they want you to see in their perfect little Insta-square and you have no idea what’s going on in their real life. Theodore Roosevelt said it best when he said that “Comparison is the thief of joy.”

BIBLE TRUTHS

Let’s see what the Bible has to say about comparing yourself to others: Each of you must examine your own actions then you can be proud of your own accomplishments without comparing yourself to others. Assume your own responsibility. Galations 6:4-5 For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. James 3:16

I FELT LIKE A FAILURE.

When I start comparing myself to others, I start feeling like a failure. Like what I’m doing is not good enough, or not enough period, then that leads to envy and jealousy and those two things are not good feelings to harbor. After only a few months, I was losing my confidence and asking myself why I was even doing this. I am a perfectionist so I put so much pressure on myself to make sure everything is done just right and that there is a blog post out every week. Honestly, I had no idea how many bloggers there were, I just knew that I was a thrifty shopper and I wanted to show others how I did it on a budget plus share my DIY projects and recipes along the way. If you get caught up in the followers you have, like I did at one time then it will literally drive you crazy. Some bloggers will follow you just to get a follow back, then unfollow you. Shame on you if you do this. It’s just wrong in my opinion. (Sorry, nothing to do with comparison, this just really bothers me.)

I AM BETTER THAN THIS

I am not one to start something and not finish and I’m super type A personality and I know that I am better than letting this feeling of failure get a hold of me. Heck, I’ve barely started, I’ve got a lot to share! And, I have a pretty great life with pretty great people in it. I do have to tell myself over and over, this is my niche, I am doing me, they are doing them. I have gotten SO MUCH positive feedback from my followers that it shouldn’t matter to me what someone else is doing. If I can help one girl, I feel accomplished.

COMPLEMENT INSTEAD OF COMPARE.

I promise you I am much happier now that I only focus on myself and you have to give yourself some credit for actually stepping out and creating something! I have met some sweet ladies that I interact with daily and I love that and I wish them the most success. The way I did that was reaching out and complementing them instead of comparing myself to them. I genuinely loved their sweater or hair or shoes so I complemented them and that’s how you start relationships and get out of that comparison rut.

YOU ARE DOING GREAT!!

We all are giving our all. Most of us have full time jobs, are mothers or are trying to make a name for ourselves. I don’t have a skin care routine, my floors need to be swept and mopped as I type this, I forget to send my son to school with lunch money, I’m too tired to give him a bath some nights and I let him eat ice cream for dinner. Hey, I’m human and so are the people that are idolized on IG and their kid probably ate Halloween candy for dinner this week. HAHA!! I may not have thousands of followers and I’m fine with that, but I’m thankful for the faithful 400+ that I do have. With a new year right around the corner I plan on sticking to why I started thethriftyblondeblog and not comparing myself to what’s around me because I like my joy and don’t want anything stealing it. If you do want to compare yourself to anyone, compare yourself to Christ (1 Corinthians 11:1)

STAY IN YOUR LANE

Why did I start blogging? Because, I believe I have things to share and say that would be beneficial to others. And, this is MY blog, there are no rules, I don’t have to write a blog post every week or post a picture on IG every day and I really just need to give myself a break. I have to remind myself daily to STAY IN MY LANE, that I am doing the best that I can with my time and resources and I’m doing a pretty good job. So are you! Just opening the Insta app can be overwhelming and mentally it can take a toll on you if you let it. No one is perfect. We all have problems and issues, some just make it look better than others or don’t talk about them. It’s a breath of fresh air when I see a feed that is different; that doesn’t conform to the “norm.” All of the “blogger babes” that I follow, I do so for a reason. You are all such an inspiration and if you are just starting out don’t get caught up in the comparison trap and always keep this verse in mind:

I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; My soul knows it very well. Psalm 139:14

XOXO

Lauren

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